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So poorly written #353

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stevebroshar opened this issue Sep 16, 2022 · 0 comments
Open

So poorly written #353

stevebroshar opened this issue Sep 16, 2022 · 0 comments
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@stevebroshar
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Please have a better writer edit this stuff. It's terrible.

"Thank you for either choosing PlayFab as your platform for back-end services and LiveOps or evaluating the PlayFab offering."
Yikes. What are you thanking me for? choosing, evaluating? what? This is fluff. Cut it. Start with "Welcome!" It's friendly and simple. Less words. ... "welcome" is also fluffy BS. Is it really adding value?

"The first step in adding PlayFab to any Title is adding code to authenticate and log in the player. Logging in the player returns a security token that is needed for all other API calls."
Really? Seems that step #1 is retrieving the TitleId. This section seems to present info backwards, First talks about login, then retrieving TiteId, then that need to create an account. That completely backwards. Present info in forwards order.

"In this topic we show you how to retrieve the TitleId for your Title. You can then follow the quickstart guides listed later on in this topic to learn how to use the TitleId to log a player in."
OMG. Complicated. Just tell me how to do it. Stop beating around the bush. "In this topic we show you how to retrieve the TitleId for your Title and to use it for player login. Then, we'll show how to use the login information to make API calls." Less words. Simpler wording.

"Every Title is different, so you will have a unique set of features that you must build every time"
What? I need to build unique features every time? Every time I do what? What are you trying to say? That I have to do the same thing for each title? But it's unique? Huh?

"It is important to know and understand how to map those features onto PlayFab."
In this context know and understand mean the same thing. Pick one. Simplify. Use less words.

The whole intro is a mess of ideas. Welcome, first thing, overview, note, before you start. OMG. Organize the ideas.


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@thomasgu thomasgu self-assigned this Apr 20, 2023
@thomasgu thomasgu added this to the Product Health Q1 milestone Aug 4, 2023
@thomasgu thomasgu added the Health Triaged Triaged within product health label Nov 13, 2023
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