HildegardR106.json

{"text":"Richardus seruorum dei in sprinchersbach minister indignus. hildegardi congregationi Ed. congregationis sancti roberti sanctissimę et deo dignę dispensatrici. post huius mundi terminum. supernę ciuitatis recipere consortium. Quod litteris uel ipsi sane presentium latori. pro me nunc uestrę sanctitudini interim precepi assistere et loqui hęc cause est. quia ego ipse per me atque pro me uenire quidem uolens et non ualens dies fateor et annos non paucos. hactenus in uanum hęc cogitando consumpsi. Nam quantum certe et ex quanto magnifice sanctitatis uestrę presentiam et collocutionem ab inicio semper desiderauerim. ipsum nunc cui nuda et aperta sunt omnia. non fallaciter sed uere et ueraciter deum testificor. Infelix igitur ego in dispensanda uel administranda cura pastorali constitutus. uiribusque nimirum tam mentis quam corporis prorsus destitutus. quia ad hęc dispensanda uel administranda. me satis inutilem debilemque et inparem aspicio. dolere tantum et flere. et de corpore mortis huius liberari. magis ac magis desidero. Nunc itaque sanctissima et inter feminas benedicta per uos dominum querere de causa mea ex more dominum cupio consulere. et an mihi iam ab hac ipsa occupatione et dispensatione potius cessandum et desistendum si id liceret per uos maxime uellem cognoscere et inuestigare. Litteris igitur sigillatis more et clausis. huius rei tenorem me queso causa dei quantocius rescire facite! et merens cor meum consilio et auxilio uestro in domino letificate. Responsum hildegardis. Audi mistica dei. Dominus qui possidet familiam sibi subiectam. cum aliquem de eadem familia eligit dans illi locum sanctificationis ut onus secum portet. ita quod tamen ille se excusat quod non sit dignus onus illud sufferre. tunc si dominus suus eum in hoc non audit quia sibi placet ut onus illud ferat dominum suum non commoueat. sed quantum preualeat illi humiliter obediat. Quod si post ea in eadem causa ullus defectus alicuius utilitatis propter imbecillitatem sensus et scientię illius subripuerit. ipsi non oberit! quia dominus suus illud prouidebit. Nunc pater et amice in uice christi. respice ad sermonem istum. et audi. Os tuum celeste est! et mens tua cum nube floret. Vnde radix tua ascendat. et dominum deum tuum adora. induens loricam et militans contra uicia lasciuiam fugienddo! et auariciam non amplectendo. Et deus quem occulte inuocas! in amore suo suscipiet te. Abbas in Rodenkirchun. hildegardi. S. in rodenkirchun pauperis prelati habens officium. dominę et matri suę. hildegardi. de sancto roberto in pinguis. intimę dilectionis et orationis affectum. Sicut multitudo fidelium proclamat. non est mirum quod deus requisitus a uobis inuenitur. cum et appareat uobis quia fidem non fictam habetis in illum. Et quod maius est. eius fauore et gratia integritatem puericię ipsi consecrastis! et ex tunc in sanctitate et iusticia utpote uas electionis hactenus coram eo uixistis. Et procul dubio qui uos taliter conuersari constituit. et quod precipuum est. quia archana misteriorum suorum per uos innotescit. dignam quoque exauditioni iudicat pro quibuscumque in nomine eius pecieritis. Et certe quę erga uos sunt. quę et audiui et ex parte uidi absque ulla ambiguitate diuina et sancta esse credo. et nulla racione de his possum dubitare! cum sciam nichil deo esse impossibile. Deus namque sicut per uiros prophetantes. sic etiam per sanctas feminas secreta diuinitatis suę pandere aliquando uoluit. et potuit testante iohel! effundam inquit spiritum meum super omnem carnem et prophetabunt filij uestri et filię uestrę! sed et super seruos et ancillas meas effundam de spiritu meo. Porro legitur deboram. oldam. annam matrem samuelis. elisabeth matrem sancti iohannis baptistę aliasque mulieres deo deuotas spiritum prophetię habuisse et tamen coniugatas fuisse. quanto magis uos omnino carnis fragilitatem expertem a puerilibus annis pudiciciam deo seruantem? Inmensas gratias domina omnipotenti misericordię refero quod tantundem ad beati tudinis uestre noticiam pertingere promerui! unde et materna uiscera uestra humiliter pulso. quatenus uerba consolationis per scripta uestra ad me dirigatis. et multum in procellis fluctuantem. sicut et sepius uiua uoce fecistis. ita etiam et nunc in scripto ad confirmationem memorię erigatis. Responsum hildegardis. Mens tua niueę nubi similis est. quę aeriam nubem in qua sol fulminat transcendit. et etiam interdum similis est turbidę nubi quę tempestatem portat. Niuea enim nubes tedium uagantis mentis est. aeria autem puram scientiam per pacientiam quę fidem habet intendit. sed turbida turbulentiam multę tristicię in inquietis mentibus portat. Tu disce quod niuea nubes aerem illum habet qui nec frigidus nec calidus est! et de quo utilia aromata non crescunt. Purus autem aer rorem et planam temperiem et pluuiam dat. de quo uiridaria et flores proficiunt. Sed turbida nubes aerem aquilonis habet. qui omnem uiriditatem arescere facit! et de quo flores cadunt. Ista tu fuge. et in puro aere sta et permane. et in uita quam nescis creatoris tui memento! nec illum fugias cum eum uidendo non cognoscis. De uita etiam illa spiritus tuus redolebat qui anima nominatus est. quando anima de ipsa processit. Anima namque opera ponit et probat siue bona siue mala sint. et eisdem operibus spiritus fortissima ui molendinum est. Tu autem edificium bonorum operum edifica. ut cum circulus animę tuę fuerit ociosus edificium istud inueniat. quod si non inuenerit. in ruinam uadit. Vnde quoque strenue uigila. antequam umbra obitus tui appropinquet. Igneus spiritus sanctus in hoc te adiuuabit. Abbas de Flanheim. hildegardi Sanctę et uenerandę in christo matri suę domine. hildegardi. de pinguia. h. de flanheim prepositus licet indignus. multam orationis et obsequij deuotionem. Cordium inspector deus nouit. quam libenter sanctitatem uestram  obsequijs honorarem. si ordinatione diuina locum et facultatem acciperem. Interim igitur accepta sit uobis queso deuocio mea. et sicut dudum uerbo rogaui orate pro me ad dominum ut uobis reuelet quę circa me sunt. quatenus de bonis reddere gratias. de malis uero dignis penitentię fructibus deo satisfacere merear antequam moriar. Quicquid dominus ostendit uobis de me. scripto mihi significare dignemini. et orationibus uestris me habetote  commendatum. Familiarius et amplius uobis scripsissem! si corporis infirmitas non obstitisset. Responsum hildegardis: Lux uiuens tibi dicit. ut strenue uigiles. et ne tediuum in cophino mentis tuę colligas quasi alienus sis. ita scilicet uelut possibilitatem loquendi non habeas. Deus autem in te requirit. quod possibilitatem habeas corripere ouile tuum. Vnde te ipsum accusa quia deum in purissimo fonte in hoc non inspicis. sed tantum dicis. deus deus meus adiuua me! et tamen sic operando eum non tangis. O bone miles nunc surge. quia gratia dei ad te currit et in eternum uiues. ita ut uiuens lapis sis in celesti ierusalem. Abbas in hegenhee. hildegardi. Hildigardi deo dilectę et sororum de sancto Roberto in pingis magistrę uenerandę. W. fratrum in hegenhee. prelatus  quamuis indignus! donum scientiaę et sapientię. et perpetuę integritatis premium. Ut primum uestrę sanctitatis famam audiui! ad salutandam eam missis uobis litteris meis maturaui. Sed quia utrum presentię uestrę allatę sint. an non. incertum habeo. et ideo nouas prioribus adiciens. multociens mittere non cesso! quousque eas presentię uestrę exhibitas esse cognouerim. Et nunc in his uobis transmissis litteris meis ad opem orationum uestrarum. pauper ualde et egenus confugio. quia post figuram hominis nescio quid de donis altissimi acceperim. caligat uisus. surdescit auditus. inopia loquelę lingua constringitur. defectu uocis et deuotione mentis in diuinis laudibus mutesco tardi tate intellectus prepeditur. memoria labilitate exinanitur. superbia animus inflatur. ira accenditur. tristicia constringitur. accidia deicitur. pusillanimitate et uerecundia contumelię confunditur. Sed his malis omnibus accessit mihi grauis et molesta infirmitas. quam nisi misericordia dei per te euadam. necesse est mihi per eum post modicum periculum uitę imminere. Sed quia pius et misericors est deus. et uoluntatem timentium se faciet. peto ut per orationes uestras hęc omnia mala tam in corpore quam in anima euadam. sublatoque a me iugo dominationis inimicorum meorum. ualde enim aggrauatum est super me iugum eorum mihi aliquam partem de multitudine misericordiarum suarum impendat. Num et mihi seruauit benedictionem? Michi obsecro etiam ut benedicat. Peto etiam uestram sanctitatem si tamen petere audeo. ut de futuro statu uitę meę me doceatis. Hęc autem omnia a uobis querere ea presumptio fecit. quia hęc omnia uobis posibilia esse per eum qui in uobis habitat christum celebris fama diuulgauit. Uale domina! et dignum me deus faciat tam responsione quam adiutorio orationum uestrarum. Nam uiuum et defunctum! sanctis orationibus uestris me committo. Responsum hildegardis Lux uiuens dicit. Prima causa quam corde tuo sustinuisti flumen dedit. secunda claritatem ostendit. tercia uero quę in pastorali cura est optima est. ita si oues tuę uocem tuam audiunt. Quod si te non audiunt. prelationem fuge! sic tamen quod recte racionem reddas de talento tuo. Nam si non potes operari per magistrationem in fratribus tuis. esto similis eis in subiectione. Sed dico tibi. Tu fatigatus es in tedio diuersitatis uicissitudinum conuersationis tuę mentis. Vnde magis tibi expedit. ut angustiam habeas pro alijs fratribus tuis. quam te solum in subiectione coerceas. Uiue ergo in igneo datore. et ne tardes in uigili sensu. Abbas De Vescera. hildegardi  Venerabili et dilectissimę in christo sorori dominę hildegardi! frater de uescera uidere deum deorum in syon. Quantum desiderium habeam quamuis peccator uidendi beatitudinem uestram. hinc estimari potest quod longe positus. presentiam uestram spiritu intueor. Quis enim eam uidere. ei colloqui non appetat. quę ut cetera sileam spiritu dei infusa crebro celestia archana eructat. Huius gratia ad uos presentia scripta direxi. recepturus ut spero solacium simul et consilium super curis quibus uehementer coartor. Ecce enim ego qui pro me racionem reddere non sufficio. aliorum multorum curam tremens ago. dei timore et amore fratrum id extorquente. Cum autem perpenderem me locum prelati tenere quem factis implere non possem. subito apprehenderunt me dolores ut parturientis! quippe cum longa fatigatio penę omnem scientię intellectum mihi subduxit. Ne igitur domini gregem propter meam negligentiam contingat periclitari. cogitaui curam susceptam derelinquere! et ad alterum locum me transferre. Quaproptet suppliciter precor ut dubiam mentem consilio uestro confirmetis. et quę sit uoluntas domini super hac re mihi scriptis uestris remandate. Noui humilitatem uestram quod colloquium nostrum non abhorretis! domino loquente cum publicanis. Ecce uestrum super hac causa expectamus iudicium. quoniam quicquid domino inspirante mihi suggesseritis. id me subire proposui. Uos autem angustijs meis compassa! tanto affectuosius dominum exorate. Abyssus reuersa sollicitudinum continuarum circumdat me! et pelagus curarum ingentium pene absorbet me. Miserere ergo mater. miserere filio ad te de longe clamanti! atque iam prolabentem. consilio. oratione. quantocius subleuare curato. Semper ualeatis in domino. Responsum hildegardis. Secreta lux dicit. Tu exterritus es quasi de uento! et dormitas in ligno uiriditatis mentis tuę. Sed homo qui uiriditatem  interioris cordis sui habet! in excelso parietis edificat. Pastor autem qui ouile pascit. non habens intrinsecus adiutorium in necessitatibus ouilis sui sed fatigatus fugit. illi pastoralis cura non proderit! unde idem faciat se similem oui et non pastori. Tu homo es sicut undans in aquis qui uix liberatur ne dimergatur. et ubique prudentiam inscpicis. sed tamen deficis in uiribus! non autem in uoluntate. Vnde et gratia dei ad te resplendet. Abbas in eluestat. hildegardi. Dominę suę et magistrę hildegardi. frater N. in eluestat inops et pauper. una cum grege sibi commisso. perenni uirginum admitti collegio. Multis uos sepe pulsaui litteris. multa uos presentialiter peticione conueni! numquam a uobis uti promisistis litteras extorquere potui. Numquid quod credi nefas est. hoc generis mei non admittit uilis nacio aut uilis personę abiectio! aut forsitan quod magis credi potest nulla meritorum intercessio? Sapientibus ait apostolus et insipientibus debitor sum. et ipsa ueritas. sinite paruulos uenire ad me. Numquid apud te mater est personarum acceptio? Absit. Nunc autem sepius ad te clamantem. uel semel me pauperem exaudi. et dominum nostrum pro misero exora. quatenus seruulum in se confidentem. multis et uariis tribulationibus et angustijs circumdatum releuare dignetur. Responsum hildegardis. Serena lux quę dat uerba ruminandi. dicit. O homo! tu habes fiduciam cogitandi in filium dei. Sed tamen dubitas cibum illum frangere. quem ipse comedere uis in dictante mente tua. Quomodo et quare circuis diuersa cribrando et undique aspiciendo. ubi inueniatur res illa quę in cerimonia sit? Quare facis hoc? Deus edificat in quacumque bene et iuste operante causa. Surge ergo ad lumen! et in eternum uiues. Nam deus habet sibi holocaustum in instrumento suo. Beatus est ille qui deum semper tenet in omnibus causis suis. quia diabolus illum numquam decipiet. Uiue ergo tu o  homo! et esto uictoriosus in obumbroso mundo. Abbas in selbolth. Hildegardi. Hildigardi uenerabili omnipotentis dei famulę! N. humilis et modicus prouisor in selbolth. omni gratia diuinę largitatis affluere. et post hęc omnium regum domino iesu christo in celesti thalamo copulari. Benedicta omnipotentis dei misericordia. quę in his temporibus iniquitatis. tanquam lampadem fulgentem in tenebris te suis donauit fidelibus consolandis. Famam igitur tuę beatitudinis per multum temporis audiens. et iam dudum uera esse quę dicebantur cognoscens. in tantum tuę beatitudini congaudeo. et condelector. ut licet nulla sit in conspectu dei peticio mea. tamen quod stulticia et fatuitas uideri  potest. memoriam tui semper habeo in orationibus meis. id petens. id optans. ut collata tibi misericordię suę beneficia dominus in te semper custodiat. et custodienda in te semper magis ac magis adaugeat. sanctorumque suorum in eterna gloria te sociam faciat. Sed quoniam presentiam tuam cuius magno teneor desiderio. corporaliter adire nequeo. per presentes litteras inquantum ualeo supplex et humilis adeo! et almitatis tuę pedibus sepius sepiusque aduoluor. quatenus pro calamitatibus meis et miserijs deum omnipotentem attentius exorare non dedigneris. Neque enim dubito! quin omnia quę uolueris apud habitatorem sancti tui pectoris spiritum sanctum obtinere possis. Sed nec de hoc ambigo. quin omnem statum meum. et omnia quę circa me aguntur. preterita. presentia. et futura. per presentes litteras ipso reuelante cognoscas. Vnde si ullomodo uilitas paruitatis meę id petere presumit. pedibus sanctitatis tuę toto animo et corpore submissus deprecor. ut pro eodem statu meo siue ammonendo de preteritis atque presentibus. siue premonendo et cautum faciendo de futuris. et uitę meę fine si id contrarium tibi non sit. per scripta tua animam meam letificare non dedigneris. Responsum hildegardis. 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Quod si post ea in eadem causa ullus defectus alicuius","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":1943,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":3970,"index":1244,"guid":"guid1244","text":"utilitatis propter imbecillitatem sensus et scientię illius subripuerit. ipsi non oberit! quia dominus suus illud prouidebit. Nunc pater et amice in uice christi. respice ad sermonem istum. et audi. Os tuum celeste est! et mens tua cum nube floret. Vnde radix tua ascendat. et dominum deum tuum adora. induens loricam et militans contra uicia lasciuiam fugienddo! et auariciam non amplectendo. Et deus quem occulte inuocas! in amore suo suscipiet te. Abbas in Rodenkirchun. hildegardi. S. in rodenkirchun pauperis prelati habens officium. dominę et matri suę. hildegardi. de sancto roberto in pinguis. intimę dilectionis et orationis affectum. Sicut multitudo fidelium proclamat. non est mirum quod deus requisitus a uobis inuenitur. cum et appareat uobis quia fidem non fictam habetis in illum. Et quod maius est. eius fauore et gratia integritatem puericię ipsi consecrastis! et ex tunc in sanctitate et iusticia utpote uas electionis hactenus coram eo uixistis. Et procul dubio qui uos taliter conuersari constituit. et quod precipuum est. quia archana misteriorum suorum per uos innotescit. dignam quoque exauditioni iudicat pro quibuscumque in nomine eius pecieritis. Et certe quę erga uos sunt. quę et audiui et ex parte uidi absque ulla ambiguitate diuina et sancta esse credo. et nulla racione de his possum dubitare! cum sciam nichil deo esse impossibile. Deus namque sicut per uiros prophetantes. sic etiam per sanctas feminas secreta diuinitatis suę pandere aliquando uoluit. et potuit testante iohel! effundam inquit spiritum meum super omnem carnem et prophetabunt filij uestri et filię uestrę! sed et super seruos et ancillas meas effundam de spiritu meo. Porro legitur deboram. oldam. annam matrem samuelis. elisabeth matrem sancti iohannis baptistę aliasque mulieres deo deuotas spiritum prophetię habuisse et tamen coniugatas fuisse. quanto magis uos omnino carnis fragilitatem expertem a puerilibus annis pudiciciam deo seruantem? Inmensas gratias domina omnipotenti misericordię refero quod tantundem ad beati","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":3972,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":5814,"index":1245,"guid":"guid1245","text":"tudinis uestre noticiam pertingere promerui! unde et materna uiscera uestra humiliter pulso. quatenus uerba consolationis per scripta uestra ad me dirigatis. et multum in procellis fluctuantem. sicut et sepius uiua uoce fecistis. ita etiam et nunc in scripto ad confirmationem memorię erigatis. Responsum hildegardis. Mens tua niueę nubi similis est. quę aeriam nubem in qua sol fulminat transcendit. et etiam interdum similis est turbidę nubi quę tempestatem portat. Niuea enim nubes tedium uagantis mentis est. aeria autem puram scientiam per pacientiam quę fidem habet intendit. sed turbida turbulentiam multę tristicię in inquietis mentibus portat. Tu disce quod niuea nubes aerem illum habet qui nec frigidus nec calidus est! et de quo utilia aromata non crescunt. Purus autem aer rorem et planam temperiem et pluuiam dat. de quo uiridaria et flores proficiunt. Sed turbida nubes aerem aquilonis habet. qui omnem uiriditatem arescere facit! et de quo flores cadunt. Ista tu fuge. et in puro aere sta et permane. et in uita quam nescis creatoris tui memento! nec illum fugias cum eum uidendo non cognoscis. De uita etiam illa spiritus tuus redolebat qui anima nominatus est. quando anima de ipsa processit. Anima namque opera ponit et probat siue bona siue mala sint. et eisdem operibus spiritus fortissima ui molendinum est. Tu autem edificium bonorum operum edifica. ut cum circulus animę tuę fuerit ociosus edificium istud inueniat. quod si non inuenerit. in ruinam uadit. Vnde quoque strenue uigila. antequam umbra obitus tui appropinquet. Igneus spiritus sanctus in hoc te adiuuabit. Abbas de Flanheim. hildegardi Sanctę et uenerandę in christo matri suę domine. hildegardi. de pinguia. h. de flanheim prepositus licet indignus. multam orationis et obsequij deuotionem. Cordium inspector deus nouit. quam libenter sanctitatem uestram ","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":5816,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":7719,"index":1246,"guid":"guid1246","text":"obsequijs honorarem. si ordinatione diuina locum et facultatem acciperem. Interim igitur accepta sit uobis queso deuocio mea. et sicut dudum uerbo rogaui orate pro me ad dominum ut uobis reuelet quę circa me sunt. quatenus de bonis reddere gratias. de malis uero dignis penitentię fructibus deo satisfacere merear antequam moriar. Quicquid dominus ostendit uobis de me. scripto mihi significare dignemini. et orationibus uestris me habetote  commendatum. Familiarius et amplius uobis scripsissem! si corporis infirmitas non obstitisset. Responsum hildegardis: Lux uiuens tibi dicit. ut strenue uigiles. et ne tediuum in cophino mentis tuę colligas quasi alienus sis. ita scilicet uelut possibilitatem loquendi non habeas. Deus autem in te requirit. quod possibilitatem habeas corripere ouile tuum. Vnde te ipsum accusa quia deum in purissimo fonte in hoc non inspicis. sed tantum dicis. deus deus meus adiuua me! et tamen sic operando eum non tangis. O bone miles nunc surge. quia gratia dei ad te currit et in eternum uiues. ita ut uiuens lapis sis in celesti ierusalem. Abbas in hegenhee. hildegardi. Hildigardi deo dilectę et sororum de sancto Roberto in pingis magistrę uenerandę. W. fratrum in hegenhee. prelatus  quamuis indignus! donum scientiaę et sapientię. et perpetuę integritatis premium. Ut primum uestrę sanctitatis famam audiui! ad salutandam eam missis uobis litteris meis maturaui. Sed quia utrum presentię uestrę allatę sint. an non. incertum habeo. et ideo nouas prioribus adiciens. multociens mittere non cesso! quousque eas presentię uestrę exhibitas esse cognouerim. Et nunc in his uobis transmissis litteris meis ad opem orationum uestrarum. pauper ualde et egenus confugio. quia post figuram hominis nescio quid de donis altissimi acceperim. caligat uisus. surdescit auditus. inopia loquelę lingua constringitur. defectu uocis et deuotione mentis in diuinis laudibus mutesco tardi","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":7721,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":9576,"index":1247,"guid":"guid1247","text":"tate intellectus prepeditur. memoria labilitate exinanitur. superbia animus inflatur. ira accenditur. tristicia constringitur. accidia deicitur. pusillanimitate et uerecundia contumelię confunditur. Sed his malis omnibus accessit mihi grauis et molesta infirmitas. quam nisi misericordia dei per te euadam. necesse est mihi per eum post modicum periculum uitę imminere. Sed quia pius et misericors est deus. et uoluntatem timentium se faciet. peto ut per orationes uestras hęc omnia mala tam in corpore quam in anima euadam. sublatoque a me iugo dominationis inimicorum meorum. ualde enim aggrauatum est super me iugum eorum mihi aliquam partem de multitudine misericordiarum suarum impendat. Num et mihi seruauit benedictionem? Michi obsecro etiam ut benedicat. Peto etiam uestram sanctitatem si tamen petere audeo. ut de futuro statu uitę meę me doceatis. Hęc autem omnia a uobis querere ea presumptio fecit. quia hęc omnia uobis posibilia esse per eum qui in uobis habitat christum celebris fama diuulgauit. Uale domina! et dignum me deus faciat tam responsione quam adiutorio orationum uestrarum. Nam uiuum et defunctum! sanctis orationibus uestris me committo. Responsum hildegardis Lux uiuens dicit. Prima causa quam corde tuo sustinuisti flumen dedit. secunda claritatem ostendit. tercia uero quę in pastorali cura est optima est. ita si oues tuę uocem tuam audiunt. Quod si te non audiunt. prelationem fuge! sic tamen quod recte racionem reddas de talento tuo. Nam si non potes operari per magistrationem in fratribus tuis. esto similis eis in subiectione. Sed dico tibi. Tu fatigatus es in tedio diuersitatis uicissitudinum conuersationis tuę mentis. Vnde magis tibi expedit. ut angustiam habeas pro alijs fratribus tuis. quam te solum in subiectione coerceas. Uiue ergo in igneo datore. et ne tardes in uigili sensu. Abbas De Vescera. hildegardi ","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":9578,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":11429,"index":1248,"guid":"guid1248","text":"Venerabili et dilectissimę in christo sorori dominę hildegardi! frater de uescera uidere deum deorum in syon. Quantum desiderium habeam quamuis peccator uidendi beatitudinem uestram. hinc estimari potest quod longe positus. presentiam uestram spiritu intueor. Quis enim eam uidere. ei colloqui non appetat. quę ut cetera sileam spiritu dei infusa crebro celestia archana eructat. Huius gratia ad uos presentia scripta direxi. recepturus ut spero solacium simul et consilium super curis quibus uehementer coartor. Ecce enim ego qui pro me racionem reddere non sufficio. aliorum multorum curam tremens ago. dei timore et amore fratrum id extorquente. Cum autem perpenderem me locum prelati tenere quem factis implere non possem. subito apprehenderunt me dolores ut parturientis! quippe cum longa fatigatio penę omnem scientię intellectum mihi subduxit. Ne igitur domini gregem propter meam negligentiam contingat periclitari. cogitaui curam susceptam derelinquere! et ad alterum locum me transferre. Quaproptet suppliciter precor ut dubiam mentem consilio uestro confirmetis. et quę sit uoluntas domini super hac re mihi scriptis uestris remandate. Noui humilitatem uestram quod colloquium nostrum non abhorretis! domino loquente cum publicanis. Ecce uestrum super hac causa expectamus iudicium. quoniam quicquid domino inspirante mihi suggesseritis. id me subire proposui. Uos autem angustijs meis compassa! tanto affectuosius dominum exorate. Abyssus reuersa sollicitudinum continuarum circumdat me! et pelagus curarum ingentium pene absorbet me. Miserere ergo mater. miserere filio ad te de longe clamanti! atque iam prolabentem. consilio. oratione. quantocius subleuare curato. Semper ualeatis in domino. Responsum hildegardis. Secreta lux dicit. Tu exterritus es quasi de uento! et dormitas in ligno uiriditatis mentis tuę. Sed homo qui uiriditatem ","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":11431,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":13318,"index":1249,"guid":"guid1249","text":"interioris cordis sui habet! in excelso parietis edificat. Pastor autem qui ouile pascit. non habens intrinsecus adiutorium in necessitatibus ouilis sui sed fatigatus fugit. illi pastoralis cura non proderit! unde idem faciat se similem oui et non pastori. Tu homo es sicut undans in aquis qui uix liberatur ne dimergatur. et ubique prudentiam inscpicis. sed tamen deficis in uiribus! non autem in uoluntate. Vnde et gratia dei ad te resplendet. Abbas in eluestat. hildegardi. Dominę suę et magistrę hildegardi. frater N. in eluestat inops et pauper. una cum grege sibi commisso. perenni uirginum admitti collegio. Multis uos sepe pulsaui litteris. multa uos presentialiter peticione conueni! numquam a uobis uti promisistis litteras extorquere potui. Numquid quod credi nefas est. hoc generis mei non admittit uilis nacio aut uilis personę abiectio! aut forsitan quod magis credi potest nulla meritorum intercessio? Sapientibus ait apostolus et insipientibus debitor sum. et ipsa ueritas. sinite paruulos uenire ad me. Numquid apud te mater est personarum acceptio? Absit. Nunc autem sepius ad te clamantem. uel semel me pauperem exaudi. et dominum nostrum pro misero exora. quatenus seruulum in se confidentem. multis et uariis tribulationibus et angustijs circumdatum releuare dignetur. Responsum hildegardis. Serena lux quę dat uerba ruminandi. dicit. O homo! tu habes fiduciam cogitandi in filium dei. Sed tamen dubitas cibum illum frangere. quem ipse comedere uis in dictante mente tua. Quomodo et quare circuis diuersa cribrando et undique aspiciendo. ubi inueniatur res illa quę in cerimonia sit? Quare facis hoc? Deus edificat in quacumque bene et iuste operante causa. Surge ergo ad lumen! et in eternum uiues. Nam deus habet sibi holocaustum in instrumento suo. Beatus est ille qui deum semper tenet in omnibus causis suis. quia diabolus illum numquam decipiet. Uiue ergo tu o ","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null},{"startIndex":13320,"isZeroPoint":false,"isDeleted":false,"endIndex":15208,"index":1250,"guid":"guid1250","text":"homo! et esto uictoriosus in obumbroso mundo. Abbas in selbolth. Hildegardi. Hildigardi uenerabili omnipotentis dei famulę! N. humilis et modicus prouisor in selbolth. omni gratia diuinę largitatis affluere. et post hęc omnium regum domino iesu christo in celesti thalamo copulari. Benedicta omnipotentis dei misericordia. quę in his temporibus iniquitatis. tanquam lampadem fulgentem in tenebris te suis donauit fidelibus consolandis. Famam igitur tuę beatitudinis per multum temporis audiens. et iam dudum uera esse quę dicebantur cognoscens. in tantum tuę beatitudini congaudeo. et condelector. ut licet nulla sit in conspectu dei peticio mea. tamen quod stulticia et fatuitas uideri  potest. memoriam tui semper habeo in orationibus meis. id petens. id optans. ut collata tibi misericordię suę beneficia dominus in te semper custodiat. et custodienda in te semper magis ac magis adaugeat. sanctorumque suorum in eterna gloria te sociam faciat. Sed quoniam presentiam tuam cuius magno teneor desiderio. corporaliter adire nequeo. per presentes litteras inquantum ualeo supplex et humilis adeo! et almitatis tuę pedibus sepius sepiusque aduoluor. quatenus pro calamitatibus meis et miserijs deum omnipotentem attentius exorare non dedigneris. Neque enim dubito! quin omnia quę uolueris apud habitatorem sancti tui pectoris spiritum sanctum obtinere possis. Sed nec de hoc ambigo. quin omnem statum meum. et omnia quę circa me aguntur. preterita. presentia. et futura. per presentes litteras ipso reuelante cognoscas. Vnde si ullomodo uilitas paruitatis meę id petere presumit. pedibus sanctitatis tuę toto animo et corpore submissus deprecor. ut pro eodem statu meo siue ammonendo de preteritis atque presentibus. siue premonendo et cautum faciendo de futuris. et uitę meę fine si id contrarium tibi non sit. per scripta tua animam meam letificare non dedigneris. Responsum hildegardis. ","type":"paragraph","userGuid":"mj","value":null,"layer":null}]}