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[^1] Doesn’t have to be Pig — Hive, Cascading, and Crunch and other high-level frameworks abstract out the boring stuff while still making it easy to write custom components.
[^2] If the novel lasts all week, someone will tell this joke and then we will walk carefully to the bar.
The church, it is close by -- but the way is cold and icy. The bar, it is far away -- but we shall walk carefully.
[^3] … and when the harsh reality of a production dataset reveals that your data has an unforseen and crippling "stuck reducer" problem, you’re facing a fundamental re-think of your program’s design rather than a one-line change from JOIN to SKEW JOIN. See the chapter on Advanced Pig.