Backport #4136 to iron: Add API to gracefully cancel a controller

[Timple]

Backport of #4136 to iron.

Feel free to close if this is too much of an api/abi break.

Only the implementation is backported, not the pure pursuit modifications as they modify behavior.

---

For Maintainers:

• Check that any new parameters added are updated in navigation.ros.org
• Check that any significant change is added to the migration guide
• Check that any new features OR changes to existing behaviors are reflected in the tuning guide
• Check that any new functions have Doxygen added
• Check that any new features have test coverage
• Check that any new plugins is added to the plugins page
• If BT Node, Additionally: add to BT's XML index of nodes for groot, BT package's readme table, and BT library lists

[mergify]

@Timple, all pull requests must be targeted towards the main development branch.
Once merged into main, it is possible to backport to @iron, but it must be in main
to have these changes reflected into new distributions.

[SteveMacenski]

Unfortunately this breaks API stability :( But otherwise I would have loved to, this is a really useful feature. Thankfully, Jazzy's only a month away!